The secret to you

When I had the hardest time in my life, when there wasn't any hope or any light, when I felt I have nothing left... I found this video. First I cried like crazy, then I felt a warm feeling inside of me. I watched this video about 20 times in a row. And what I did... I decided that I want to feel like that, I want to see the world like that, I want to make a change in my life! I watched this video over and over again, every morning. So every day I started over again. It was releasing, cause if last day was going all wrong, I could start again, everyday. It truly is how you see the world, how you choose to see it. It's not easy, not at all. But you can collect things around you that makes this videos kinds of feelings stronger.

Life isn't easy. It's all about ups and downs. Today my mother said to me something that made me remember how hard it was some times ago (I have to add here, that me and my mother.. we weren't that close, she didn't know much about me or my life before my hardest time when I had to rely on her 'cause there weren't anything else left, and I'm so grateful about that, we got a whole new beginning for our relationship): "I remember how you felt.. I didn't truly understand or know what you felt but I remember it.. There wasn't anything for you, not a single reason to do anything, not any strength left. You didn't have the strength to go to market to buy food or going to shower to wash your hair. You didn't have any light in your life, anything to look forward in the future. I remember it too well. But now it's hard to even imagine that there was such time. To others it must be so powering to know that there is a escape from so deep endless darkness. You are full of life light!" At that moment I realized again how amazing my life is, even there isn't anything special... The life itself is amazing, so big opportunity, so big gift!

I think that the secret to you is your life! It's all about understanding how amazing life is, how all the little things are amazing! This isn't about daily ups and downs, it's about everything, the big picture! Of course it includes the daily faced things... But I think it's something more. It's the whole journey. The thing is that the little things makes the big journey :)! Think big enough, think small enough, find the secret in you - And you'll be free!

I'm on my way to the new adventure... to ARGENTINA!

It's starting to get real... I've been a bit afraid about talking this trip, only because if it wouldn't come true. But now it's real! I bought my flights :)! I can't remember when I was this excited! 5 months in a new city, big city Buenos Aires. It's going to be totally different world! I can't wait to get there! I have been working so much to collect the money for the staying there, but I did it! Couple years ago I wouldn't even think about leaving Finland, now it's the best thing in my life! I will be studying in UADE (Universidad Argentina de la Empresa) and it's going to be all about Latin American markets.

It feels like this is a whole new beginning for me again! I will learn so much about the culture and hopefully something about language too. I started to study Spanish two months ago, so I won't know much about it before leaving. But even little is more than nothing I guess :D! I hope I will find many new things about myself and get more courage so I could do almost anything after coming back there. At least I would have that feeling.

I found some awesome pics from google... I'm pretty sure I will enjoy my staying there :)!

Now I know why I've had to let go so many things in life, why I've been in so many storms. This life doesn't go in a way I've planned, not at all. But that's not the point! It's never about the beginning or the end! Think about all the stories you know; it's all about what happens between beginning and end. I know now, that if I don't write my own story, someone else will do it for me, that's for sure! I can't write anything completely ready for the coming years, but I can write my story by the choices I make in life. Those makes my story complete. And now I know that I want to write it by myself! This is it! This moment is our lives! All the pain really was worth it! I feel so alive! Dreams really comes true, you just have to believe and make an effort!

Is there something wrong about me or the way I write..?

I've been wondering about writing.. I've always been writing a lot, but in Finnish of course. I wanted to do something different, improve my English and also find a way to write differently than before. It's so much easier for me to write in English with a certain type of atmosphere, that type that I want to have in my texts. Still I know I probably have quite many spelling missteps here but in turn I'm confident that it will decrease over time.

The point of writing a blog is that someone would get something out of that. For different people it can be completely different things. I was thinking couple days ago, that if no-one writes any comments there can't be anyone reading my texts. That means that no-one gets nothing out of my writings. First it made me quite sad, but then I realized that I have some kind of settings on; you have to be in google+ to comment my posts. I was so  relieved, because I just changed the settings and know anyone can write a comment. Interaction is one of the most important things in learning, that's why we need each others. I truly want to learn about people, about life. But I won't be able to do it by myself. And if my writings aren't good at all, that's quite important feedback too :)

This is a good lesson for me! It's too easy to think "I'm not worth something, I'm not good enough". The hard and challenging part is to think the other way round or continue doing the things you do even you would feel like you don't know anything, that you are the worst in the whole world. Just don't give up and keep your head up high! Remember to smile and someone is going to smile back at you!

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Do something you love

I remember everyone saying: You should do something you love. For a year ago I still didn't know what I love to do or even like. I knew that I should do those kinds of things in order to feel good, but I just didn't know what those things could be. I knew I love riding, but it was the only thing and also too expensive for student budget. Then I found some people who knows places where to ride for free, but you have to control the horse by yourself and do some work int the stable too. I was a bit scared at first because I had ridden about six years ago. But when I got on a horse I felt like being in heaven! I knew exactly what to do. It felt so natural and relaxing, like being part of the nature.

For me riding is the most relaxing thing in the whole world!
I can't describe the feeling I got from it, but it's worth more than a huge heap of money!

The point is that you have to do thing you like, for yourself. I have to find more those things, cheap things! I didn't have opportunity to think what I want to do, because I was living my life against my nature. I was so busy with the work and studies. Oh, I just hated it! It wasn't my life! But I know that no-one else could have been able to change it, I had to do it by myself. Same thing here. You can start by doing something small. I don't know why but couple years ago I didn't have that courage, so even if I would have known about this free opportunity to ride, I wouldn't have used it. I'am full of excuses as almost everyone of us. We have multiple reasons why we don't change the way we live. Only thing we can do is moan. That's not life! We are here for doing things, experiences. Not everything can be nice, positive, fun, but those hard experiences teaches you so much, but only if you want to learn something from those too.

Rainy days..

These are the days when you are allowed to just chill out. You can do whatever you want or just be by yourself, do nothing. When I was a child I was allowed to watch one Disney movie with my sisters on a rainy day. I loved that! Sometimes I still do that. It is really relaxing and it helps to clear the head.  

These are the days when you can think your life over. Every negative thing in your life doesn't just go away, some of them requires time and thinking through. It may be painful but extremely helpful on a long run. What goes around comes around, and that's the unfortunate truth. 

These are the days when you can give time to things you would like to wash away with the rain. And in the end you just let them go with the rain. When the rain stops, you can feel clear, purified human being as the nature is after rain. Remember, there must be sunshine after the rain. During the darkest times just believe in that!

Time for a laugh!

This is the result of a challenging school work. It almost went too serious, too stressful.. But then, this happened, out of the blue, without any good reason. After this "breakdown" we continued working. And I have to say that it went much easier and smoother.

So DO NOT forget to laugh everyday! I can't say how important it is... It's just so important! Growing up, getting old or older, being adult, plausible and responsible doesn't mean you have to get serious and straight-faced. Look around, all the little people you can see; they are smiling, crying, laughing, screaming... That's true life! I have to thank my dear and priceless friend Sonja, who gave me this moment with a big laugh! And this wasn't the first time :)!

Another monday

I'm trying some very well known gimmicks 

to start my week in a empowering way. 

Waking up early seems to be a real challenge for me.
I know I would feel so much better if I would just force myself to 
wake up earlier and start the day by doing some sports. 


Well, today I DID! And if I'm being honest with you, I didn't enjoy that at all!
I was so tired! But then, after light jogging I felt weird satisfaction and
it just grew minute by minute.

We are meant to be close to the nature, outdoors. That's how people lived hundreds of years a go. I can notice that from my feelings after being a part of nature, after going around in the wild. We are part of the nature, we should connect to it. And the nature, how beautiful it is!! Amazing! The forest and the landscape I was walking around is just breathtaking! That one you can see from the pic I took. 

I'm trying to watch my eating habits.. Reasons are that I wanna be healthy and I wan't to stay moderately good shape, which isn't easy! After jogging I felt so good and my appetite seemed to be healthy too: I wanted to eat quite much but the right things, not any junk food. Nice feeling :)!

I can't describe that feeling, you have to experience that by yourself! 

 For me the hardest part is to enjoy! I'm always in a hurry.. I tried this new thing.. I had to sit down and eat VERY SLOWLY. No computer, cellphone, clock, newspaper, just music, food and me. Very slowly.. This was a whole new experience for me. First it felt stupid, but then I started to feel the peace taking control of my body and mind. Unknown feeling in the morning! It just took some patience.

Happy day

The question is:  

"What are you gonna do for the rest of your life?!?"

Do you wanna be happy?

 

Quite good way to start the day :D!

Few years ago I hated everyone who said that it's up to you to feel good, to be happy. But now I just have to agree. Would it make some harm to you if you really try to be happy in a healthy way. I've had awesome flow during the past week, the ride has been so joyful that it's even hard to understand. Did something big happen? Not really... Some good things of course but nothing so huge that could explain my extremely awesome feeling. I'm finding so many lovely things around me, the little ones. The most important thing is the ability to search and see those thing: those really does exist! Don't give power to lemon! 

You have to try to be happy, it doesn't come without work at first. And the truth is that good things happens to optimism more often than to pessimism... What can we conclude from that? Well, you decide the way of thinking, you decide what you see around you. And if you see good things, good things will finally come to you, surround you. 

It's not about the way you have lived before, it's about how you decide to live for now on! I made the change! I wish you could know what I was like before... The change is huge! But that's why I'm talking about this, because if you aren't happy, you NEED TO KNOW that you can be! But you have to make the change, you have to find the strength! And remember, we all have it in ourselves! It doesn't matter what you try, JUST TRY!

Always feel free to be yourself

It's the fact that we have quite many faces; different at work or at school, with friends and family, in relationship or when being alone. I think we have to have different roles in our life, it makes communication easier and natural. Sometimes I feel there is only fine line between masks and roles. Even we have many roles, it doesn't mean you can't be who you are. The most releasing feeling is just to be you, and it's extremely important! It makes everything so easy and then meeting people (new or known) gives a big pleasure in life.

This is my little brother. He is one of a kind :D! He knows how to be himself in every cases. It doesn't matter what you do, do it with your heart. Do it proudly, do it with passion, do it in your way! This video is a good example how to do things in a way YOU enjoy it. Crazy little man full of courage. I just love to watch him grow, every year stronger and bigger need to express himself, to be who he really is. And that boy never tries to be something else. Even his quite young, he is a true role model in this case. So enjoy the video :)!

New beginning :)

So, it has been crazy lately, surprising :D! Today is the day when everything starts over again, I have opportunity for new beginning... The day is my birthday! This year I feel this day a whole different than last ones. I'm not sure why. Maybe I have had so many changes during the past year that now I feel I can do anything, I can decide to start some things in life all over again, and I mean it in a good way.

So what would I change? Fear, the little monster inside me. It is the only thing that can stop me doing the things I wanna do. But still, I just need to be determined to ignore the fear. I would also take off every prejudice that has grown on me during the past years. Skepticism is the one thing I could just throw into the flames, there's no use for that one! Then the biggest one: self-criticism... That one.. Well, I just want to forget that word even does exist. When I take those off me, I have every keys in my hand, everything! So, this is the new beginning, this is the new start again. It's nice to make/have new beginnings, those makes everything possible :)!  

I'm just feeling so damn good today! I have flu, but it really doesn't bother me at all! Today is the day when I just love being alive, love living life, love everything in my life and I refuse to notice the bad things! I deserve it, so do you :)!

Experiential Day Off

I think I really deserved one day off after a crazy period of work! So this is how I spent my day with my siblings :D! I have to say that it was truly experiential day :D! I recommend this to everyone! It really is worth of trying! 

For me it was quite challenging because I'm extremely afraid of heights.. So can you imagine me hanging in trees over 20 meters above the ground.. Well, I shout like a little girl! But I did it, and it was amazing. And after three hours of jumping in woods I was extremely tired but also extremely relaxed. I didn't feel any stress. Just pain in my muscles and so relaxed. There were times when I was just shaking because I was so scared! But I felt like a hero, the ultimate winner after I realized that I just won one of my biggest fear! So do it, try it! What ever it is you are afraid, you can do it! But it really isn't easy! 

Perseverance is rewarded :)! 

That is also very good guideline in life! Without it it's almost impossible to achieve anything.

Running running running...

I'm so sad that I haven't had enough time to write lately.. But the truth is that I haven't had time to even sleep.. I feel like I'm running all the time! And now I've reached the point where I'm just way too tired to do anything. So one weekend for work and then I'm finally free for the whole week! This is quite good lesson for me: always remember to take time for yourself! Challenging? For sure!